A Man, a Plan, a Wheel: Unicycle

(originally posted to the aforementioned Specwords list, but I like the title enough to repost it here)

When I saw the dude riding a unicycle heading into the Court St. station
just ahead of me, I thought he was pretty cool. A unicycle! He got off
just before the stairs down to the platform, apparently not deft (or
daft) enough to take them whilst mounted. Then I saw that he was wearing
a fanny-pack, and I realized that he was not quite as cool as I had
originally thought. Once on the train he took one of those PocketPC
handheld things out of his fanny, which I thought was pretty cool but in
reality wasn't. The "X"-ed out "whining" button he was wearing on his
shirt definitively pushed him over the edge to complete dork.

Some women sitting across from him flashed smiles at the sight of the
unicycle, but I think he creeped them out with looks intended to
inveigle them to hop on his lap and go for a spin. He left dejected at
De Kalb to transfer to the express and try his luck with a faster crowd.

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