Scotter's apostrophe

(From Scooter [sic], who is becoming more receptive to my blog and will perhaps use it as a wedding registry.)

Did you ever notice that more than half the song titles (as well as the album title) of The Who's Who's Next contain apostrophes? In fact, the ten titles (nine songs, one album) contain a total of seven apostrophes. Of the seven, three stand in for final "g"s at the end of verbs in their present participular forms, and one is the crucial glue that binds the "ain" to the "t," without which binding, I'm not sure where our language would be. So statistical analysis would suggest that perhaps Pete, Roger, Keith, and Whoever played the bass (unless Townshend is the bassist, in which case our mystery man is the lead guitarist (all of which is absolutely impossible to find out at our present point in history because trying to find The Who on Google is like trying to find Nemo in Toy Story III--he's not really there, but if you look closely enough, there might be a little figurine of the adorable special ed angelfish buried under some messy kid's substantial collection of He-Men.)) were not the lyrical geniuses I always believed them to be, previously, despite the absolutely brilliant ambiguity in the album's title. Who's Next. It's incredible. We all know that the possessive form of "who" does not take an apostrophe. But in this case, where Who is not a pronoun but a proper noun, the "'s" is surprisingly appropriate, making this the next big thing from a wildly popular English quartet. But it also asks the unapostrophed question: Who is next? This relates to the album's cover, which bears a photograph of the foursome walking--some of them zipping their flies as they walk, if memory serves me correctly--away from a big concrete block (unexplainable), which has a few wet spots on it, and of course, the obvious question is, Who's next?. And speaking of questions, the answer to my question is that no, you never noticed that before. Because the only reason why anybody would ever notice that is because the discoverer's computer has a bad relationship with CDDB, and when the discoverer puts the CD of Who's Next in so that he can copy the songs to his Tungsten, he has to put the titles in manually. Furthermore, this person would have to be obsessive compulsive to even care what the punctuation is for such stupid phrases as "Goin' Mobile" and "Love Ain't for Keepin'". So no. I know you, and I know that you never noticed this. I also know that you never counted how many times the verb "to rise" appears in Huckleberry Finn, but I have. So don't tell me that math is useless. And also, don't tell me you know how many "t"s and how many "o"s are in my name, because it's Scotter, dammit, and that's it.


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