Some frivolous asbestos claims

I've been putting this off, but I guess I need to get these in before Bush outlaws 'em:


  • Asbestos provides a mellower, less-trippy high, compared to other hallucinogens.

  • Asbestos and legumes, when eaten together, constitute the type of complete proteins your body can't otherwise synthesize.

  • Asbestos recognizes the value of a good tax shelter.

  • Asbestos comes from the Greek word for "tort reform."

  • Asbestos is starved of iron to the point of anemia in order to acquire that appetizing pink colour.

  • Asbestos totally toured with the Stones back in the '70s. Their guitar player could really shred!


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