Alpaca attacka
34 loves alpacas, because, c'mon, what the fuck? Billy Wagner, the Mets' new closer, loves alpacas as well:
If the Mets' win the Series next year, which honestly isn't that far-fetched, the one thing Wagner needs to make sure of is to keep the herd away from his championship ring, or an alpaca is bound to eat it.
Billy Wagner raises alpacas. It is a restful hobby for a relief pitcher. These cousins of llamas are gentle souls that want nothing more than to graze peacefully.
Caring for 38 alpacas is a fine counterpoint to Wagner's main occupation, that of relief pitcher...
...Before any zoning boards in Westchester or Connecticut become too nervous: the Wagners are leaving the alpacas back home in Virginia.
If the Mets' win the Series next year, which honestly isn't that far-fetched, the one thing Wagner needs to make sure of is to keep the herd away from his championship ring, or an alpaca is bound to eat it.
I could do a lot of better things for the world with $40+ million dollars than pay someone to pitch one inning every few days.
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